Through the Night (poem)

Toddler awoken at 1:15

not unheard, not unseen

back to bed, close the door

a visit again at quarter to four

kicked in the back, sleep off track

remove his toe from my ass crack

this phase must stop, and soon I hope

exhausted, unrested, the end of my rope

reached beseeched cogency leeched

my mind's fertile soil

nocturnal interruptions roil

peaceful nights he does spoil

staggering off, my daily toil

hazy crazy mental mazy

this quest for rest I do my best

not much you can do

when your tormentor's two

seemless sleep, my daily dream

my kid it seems ain't on my team

From Little Things

Just trying this out. One can never be sure what will come of what one's done until one does it. It's been my experience, though, that one never does it. Ahem.
There's one, then two, and before you know it you're waking up on the couch with half a pork chop in front of you, you've missed your flight, and you're wearing someone else's shoes.

12/13/5 – on earlier boat. Tired. Took pill. Thinking about work, morale, reading a computer history book. Crap to do. Thinking about writing a fictional history of the dotcom boom and bust. Just need to get to Christmas. Then get through January. Totally uninspired by this job. Wondering what I can do better, where I can be better. Just getting by. No fun.

12/12/5 – Monday morning and I feel fine. Of course I had a very relaxing weekend when I didn’t think about work one whit. I should write after work some time. Need a new notebook – have to consolidate weekend writing. Work I hate gets me paid. Work I like gets me nothing.

12/9/5 – a Friday – took one last night when I got home at 7:00 and then again this morning and must admit to feeling better – again I have no idea if this is just a comfort thing if there’s a continuous stream required at regular intervals or if you achieve a certain stasis and disrupting that stasis requires more than a 12 hour variance. Or, of course, whether I just feel better because I think I should feel better. I’ve been reading a book on philosophy and am coming to the conclusion tha the answer lies in probing the inner – at least for me. The external world and scientific advancement is plenty probed by others and I can do little to advance those efforts. However, the plumbing of the mind and what has motivated/inspired/troubled man from the moment of enlightenment is a subject I can sink my teeth into. Yes, feeling a bit better today.

12/8/5 – forgot Lamictal – I don’t know if it’s psychosomatic, but am really low energy today. Not feeling well physically and had an early morning wake up call from the kid so that may be contributing. Still taking this pill every day for nearly six weeks and then missing a day can’t be good.

12/7/5 on an earlier boat.
I had an idea for the All Hands meeting – make it like a revival meeting. Make the boss into a Jimmy Swaggert or Jim and Tammy Faye Baker – do you believe!?! Have folks come up and confess they’d strayed from the path, do a laying on of the hands – You are healed! Go forth and believe in the power of Network Security. It has some potential…
I had a dream last night I was on a boat with people from work. Not sure if the boss was there. Someone else was driving the boat. I was trying to get the VP of Sales attention but he was on the phone, I went into the next cabin and there was the Regional Sales Director also stuck to the phone. There was a rocking on the boat as it made a wild turn to avoid hitting another boat. We turned around and the boat got out of the water – like one of those Duckboats. It drove to some building and then I was in a bedroom. My sister was in bed with me and then the Director of Product Marketing came in and was looking at me very confused. I said, oh, this is my sister. That didn’t reassure her.
I think I’m thinking about work too much.